Lost in a troubled sea called: Life

Recent updates include that I failed out of college. Seeing I only have like 1 reader, this isn't a Surprise to you, is it Jana? (Seeing that I already told you)

So I got fired from my job at Pizza Time. I am unemployed, and have so many debts to pay off, rent to pay, etc. Basically, this couldn't have come at a worse time. I somewhat believe that God has forsaken me. I know I should never lose faith in The Lord, and that he'll never turn his back on me, but no matter how many times I ask him to give me guidance, I receive none. It's as if, the last time I called to him and he answered, was when he allowed me to see my Grandmother one last time before she died. Although, my gratitude for what he did then cannot be measured because it is so great, I still feel like that was the last thing he has done to assist me in this blind path called life. At this point, I have no clue whether I'll be homeless next week or not. What I need now is a good job or two, that gives me each about 6-8 hours a day, so I can work about 65-80 hours a week. I need to get back up on my feet. I even almost lost hope again, and started thinking about removing myself from this plain of existence. I don't need to be thinking about that, EVER. I think all of this worry and doubt and stress is starting to get to me.

Why did I ever fail out? I wish I could go back in time, and beat myself senseless for doing what I did. I wasted $7.5k and a whole year of what was the BIGGEST OPPORTUNITY I have ever had, and will ever have. Every second of the day, I constantly think about how much easier my life would be had I not failed out. How much better it would be. Nothing to worry about but what homework I had, and when my next test or exam was. That would've been all. Not worrying about whether I'd be homeless or not, or anything like that.

If I ever make it through this trying time in my life, and am able to return to college, which I hope will be OSU, I will do so much better, already knowing what the alternative would be. It would be like a rebirth of my work ethic.

Well, that's kind of where I am at right now. Except of course of the opportunity I might have here in Lawton. Evidently, my mother's friend Vinnie Santiago has a friend that is an electrician. And he's willing to bring me on board as his apprentice. That would be a very good thing. I wouldn't have to pay for schooling and still make money while I work to get my certification in the skill of being an Electrician. That will give me a good head start as far as a career goes.

I need not place much faith in what "might" happen, but what will. For instance, what "might" happen is that my mother's contracting corporation that she works for on Ft. Sill, might have lost the contracts for the buildings my mother works in. So basically, she might lose her job. It's hard enough for my mother to pay her bills as it is, and she makes around 40k a year salary.

Anyway, that's about all I wanted to say. Thank you.

I have to go get ready for my mother to come home from Lunch Break, so we can talk about what she needs me to do today.

Until Next time.

Highlighter Swastikas, Blacklights, Cigars, and Homemade Hookahs.

Ok, so a lot has happened in the past week. I got fashion tips from a gay guy on my floor, I went to Bible Study, and bought a sound system for my computer. I took my Psych exam, and I HOPE I did good on it. I got new posters for my room. (woo) Downloaded some new music, and got to talk to Sam. (She's my wonderful girlfriend.)

I found my cell phone! It turns out that I left it at the Elementary School that I have church in. OH! I had a terrible headache today. It was so bad that I spent all day in my room, sleeping. Woo! I have so much school to do tomorrow...(sunday)

OH. I am randomly finding posters and pictures and stuff to put in my room. I love it. I hope that, by the end of the year, I'll be out of room on my walls, and have to add them to the ceiling. It's interesting. The more I read God's word, I become more humble about my existence. It makes me regret my boastful nature. I really wish to change that and become more enveloped in his word. Tonight my friends and I decided to Party in Chris's room. He bought like 3 blacklights, and a ton of highlighters, and then he put the highlighter ink stuff in glass coke bottles full of water, and now they glow. So we went to his room, and had the blacklights on, and his weird disco ball going, and we watched Stepbrothers. And while it happened, chris decided to draw a swastika, and a penis on my face. It was hilarious. It glows! GLOWS! I think I'll buy blacklights sometime. Woo!

I am collecting more glass soda bottles. I love em. I need more posters. If anyone has them, can I get them from you?

Well, off to do other things. Night!

Tuesday, March 3rd, 2009 (entry 0) [INTRODUCTION]

This is my first entry into my Weblog from this site. This being (of course) more like a Daily Journal than a Weblog.

We'll start things off with an introduction, shall we? My name is Andrew Bamford. I am a Freshman at Oklahoma State University in Stillwater, and am an undeclared Major. And if that is enough information to find an kill me, so be it. I'm waiting you creepy Child-molesting psycho killers.

I am 18, will be 19 on March 27th, and I am currently bored out of mind. I need something to entertain me. Maybe a Car Crash or something. You know, something with a lot of twisted metal, fire, and explosions. Or I could go watch Fight Club until Bio Lab at 2:30. Wait, that would give me an hour to watch Fight Club...Nevermind then.

Family-wise, (and this will be in progression from nearest family, to most distant) I have a Mother, Leigh, and she lives in Lawton as a Government-Contracted IASO for the 434th Detatchment of Bravo Company in the 1-22 brigade or some crap. I have a Sister, Bethany, and she's a Junior at Eisenhower High School, in Lawton. She's so Smart! I have my Grandparents, William and Margaret, and they live in Grove. That's where I lived most of my life. With my Grandparents. My Grandmother has Cancer, and has been battling with it for two years. I have many friends, Travis is the best friend I could ever have, Jake is one of my besties, so is Brandan, Teacia, Chris, Sean, Caleb, Brent, Matt, and Darci. I have many other friends. Too many to list even. I am somewhat nerdy, but what self-respecting Dude in college isn't? I mean, it's a very true statement, to claim that almost every Dude in this nation, has at least some nerd in him somewhere. I worship God. If you were interested until that point, you can bugger off.

Yes I am a Christian, but at the same time, I am also quite passive when it comes to being religious. I know Scripture says to Reject Passivity, but I have to be. I don't want to come off as the "stereotypical in your business christian." Anyway, I have Lab today, and then I am done. I'll actually post my first Web Journal entry tonight. But until then, bye!